Sky Packages for Lard Azzes

Listening to the radio as I do while pecking out words from my cider addled brain, I get to hear everything. F**k television, the wireless is the pulse of the nation. There is music to soothe my hangover, and there is debate to get fired up to. And boy did I get fired up nice and tidy five minutes ago! Pass me the shant, quick sharp!
The progamme I was tuned in to was talking about Britain's benefits culture and about how some folks are seemingly happy to sit on their lardy asses and leech off the state. One horrible, unwashed scrounger, tried to justify their benefits by saying, "We get the Sky Movies package because we’re stuck in the house all week – otherwise we wouldn’t have any entertainment."
WHAT THE HELL? I HOPE THE SATELITE DISH FALLS ON YOUR F**KING HEAD, YOU PATHETIC WASTE OF SPACE!THOSE OF US WHO ACTUALLY WORK FOR A LIVING HAVE TO PAY FOR THOSE PACKAGES BY GETTING OFF OUR BACKSIDES EVERY 5AM AND PUTTING IN A DAYS GRAFT. IM JUST ABOUT BLOODY SICK OF IT!!!! I WOULDN'T LET THE B@STARDS HAVE SKY IF I RULED THE LAND. NO ENTERTAINMENT UNTIL WORK SEZ I! TOO FLIPPING RIGHT!
IT BEGGARS BELIEF THAT SOME PEOPLE COULD BE SO BONE IDLE. WHERE THE F**K IS THEIR PRIDE? THEIR DIGNITY? LOST IN THE FAT OF TESCO VALUE PIZZA AND PROCESSED CHEESE NO DOUBT. IF YOU ARE FIT TO WORK, YOU SHOULD BE DOING EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO FIND IT, INSTEAD OF SMOKING YOURSELF SILLY WATCHING CRAPPY FILMS ALL DAY! NO WONDER THIS COUNTRY IS IN THE STATE IT IS.
IIN AMERICA I BELIEVE YOU ONLY RECEIVE WELFARE FOR SO LONG AND THEN YOU HAVE TO RELY ON CHARITY. QUITE RIGHT TOO! WE CANNOT CONTINUE HANDING OUT FISTFULS OF WEDGE FOR DOING BUGGER ALL! SOME OF THESE WRETCHES GET MORE IN BENEFITS A YEAR THAN WORKING PEOPLE GET! SWINES!