What No Eats?

Remember those Chad things that were popular in the 1980's? You drew a little bald guy peeping over a wall with his big nose dangling over, then wrote 'Wot No' underneath and added a thing which was missing like 'Wot No Beer'. Well after comparing our fastfood chains to Americas I could make one saying, Wot No Eats. We are woefully behind in the food stakes, looking like scruffy paupers. And stuff the health issue, this is about CHOICE!
Over in the United States they have Wendy's, In-N-Out Burger, Jack In The Box, Dunkin' Donuts, Arby's, Sonic Drive-In, KFC, Taco Bell, Denny's (which famously never closes) Quiznos, Hot n' Now, MacDonalds, Waffle House, I could go on and on. What do we have in Britain? MacDonalds, KFC, Pizza Hut and Burger King. Thats it! Its almost laughable, if I wasn't so bloody hungry!
To add to the woe (look it IS woe alright? We're talking about junkfood here) most of them close after 11pm!? So that all the drinker has to look forward to after a merry night on the swill is a sorry looking kebab from a grim little place in some dead end street.
Granted we are the home of fish & chips and I LOVE fresh cod and chips but fish isn't so appealing when the drinker is...well, drunk. No what he/she needs is a burger or fried chicken if you don't get them before 11pm you go hungry. Or dice with death and choose that kebab (proably made from the local stray animals.)
And it doesn't end there either, no sirreee! In good old Blighty (altho im beginning to wonder whats good about it anymore) if we decide to snack on a different countries cuisine we have the amazing option of....two. Thats correct TWO; Indian or Chinese. Some places you might find the odd Greek restraunt but mainly its two. How utterly splendid! Who could want any other food when you have a vindaloo or sweet and sour chicken a cooling?
Seems those damned yankees do. (And I mean that affecionately.) When I was Stateside I could have chosen Thai, Greek, Italian, Chinese, Indian, Vietnamese, Mexican, you name it. It was brilliant and made for exciting nights for my taste buds. And places seem to be OPEN all the time, as opposed to our eat-what-you-want-as-long-as-its-before-11pm-and-Indian-Chinese malarkey.
All very depressing. Where the hell are all the burger joints? Its not as if we shun fastfood because we're a nation of health freaks because we are not! We enjoy that stuff as much as our Star Spangled cousins over there. So please, open the f**k up and give us our daily grease and coronaries.